Kansas City Chiefs (4-12). Kansas City won a game? How the H - E double toothpicks did that happen? Oh, yeah. They played Denver, Oakland and Pittsburgh. I don't know who the fourth win came against but it is certain that team was having an off day too. KC spent all its money on a one-season wonder, Cassell, in what will become known as the New England Three Card Monte trade. At the end of the deal, KC had Cassell (who promptly missed about 12 games due to injury), Denver got Kyle Orton (who?) and a second, first round draft pick (which they quickly wasted on Knowrun Moreno), and the Chicago Bears ended up with the Pride of Vanderbilt, Jay "Did I Just Throw the Ball To the Defender  Again" Cutler. Ugh! KC is rumored to be looking to Notre Dame's newly fired coach Weiss for leadership and holy communion during halftime. KC didn't have a prayer in 2009 and they won't have one in 2010 either.

Oakland Raiders (5-11). The Silver and Black must snort drugs before, during, and after the game. Over the past ten years no team has had more futility in the draft and on the field than the Raiders. Sure they went to Super Bowl about five years ago and they had a great QB in Guns Gannon and great receivers. Now they have a first-rounder QB that needs psycho-therapy just to put his pants on, they have a coach that teaches smash mouth football by smashing the other coaches in the mouth, and they have an owner who wears more bling than Mr. T. Admittedly, Al Davis helped make the NFL what it is today. But those guady necklaces he wears are putting a terrible strain on his frontal lobes. It's time for Al to retire and give the team to one of his out of work relatives

Tennessee Titans (8-8).  These guys almost pulled off the miracle of the century. Last year the TTs had the best record in the AFC. In the 2009 playoffs, they forgot how to score a lousy 20 points and fell to Baltimore at home no less, (can you believe it?). Kerry Collins, the best QB noone ever heard of became a head case. He started out that way in Carolina. Showed some sign of sanity while at Oakland. Played great for the NY Giants, and then, and then, and then last year's playoff game. He hasn't been the same since playing like a dead fish and leading the TTs to an 0-6 start this season. But it wasn't the TTs other nut-case QB that saved the day, it was Chris Johnson, only the sixth runningback in NFL history to surpass 2,000 rushing yards in a season. Now that is something to build on. With Johnson carrying the load and a defense that stopped playing tiddley winks, the TTS finished the last part of the season 8-2. Wow! All Tennessee needs is to teach its players to stay away from underaged hookers, all night clubs, and guns (apparently the whole team has been visited by the ghost of Elvis) and they will be right back in the hunt for 2010.

Miami Dolphins (7-9). Dave Barry wrote that Miami spelled backwards reads "I Maim." Too funny because that is how they played and usually the 'Fins were on the receiving end of the maiming. Did anyone see Pat White get creamed in the last game of the season? OUCH! The fish that are really mammals and not he blue-green ones without a blow-hole... oh, it's no use 'splainin' this to football people. The Dolphins lost their starting QB (Pennington) in the first game and everyone else that was worth a hoot in the games that followed. By the end of the season the only starter left standing was Ricky "Rastaman" Williams. He should have been injured but was too high to notice. The coach had to throw out the playbook and opt for the Wildcat formation, a bastardized version of the triple option. The way it works is three guys line up behind center, the center hikes the ball to the guard who gives it to the wide receiver who laterals it to the runningback who throws it downfield to the quarterback. Yes, Miami revived sandlot football for fun and amusement. They'll get back on track next year and supplant the NY Jetsons in the playoffs.

To be continued...

St Louis Rams (1-15) - PEE U. Imagine having season tickets to watch these stinkers; a team that did not win a single home game all year. On the bright side they did not give up the most points, Detroit owns that honor. They stink because at just 10 points a game they scored the fewest points of any other NFL Team. What? They couldn't get close enough to the red zone to kick at least four field goals a game? On the bright side, the Rams get first pick in the Draft. Word has it they plan to draft the Florida Gators - that's right- the whole team. I hope Tim Tebow likes corn and Budweiser. Good thing for the fans that the Cardinals (the baseball team) are no slouches.

Seattle Seahawks (5-11). Just two years ago this team was a Super Bowl contender. What the hell happened? Is their fate to be the fate of the Pittsburgh Steelers (see below)? Although their record is better than other NFL teams, these guys get the nod for second worst because they just plain gave up. Locals think they all suffered from SADS (seasonal affective disorder syndrome). All that rain gave Big Green and Blue the muggledegrumps - boo hoo! In 2010 look for the briny birds to rebound with a record of 6-10. In the upcoming draft the Seahawks are expected to select the Hooter Girls to brighten up the locker room.

Pittsburgh Steelers (9-7). The Steelers were Super Champs when? Oh, just last year. Well you could have fooled me. At one point in the season the mighty Steelers lost to five of the worst teams in the league including the Raiders, Chiefs, Bengals (that's right - they stink too), Browns and the junior league badminton team from Brighton, England. At least all the fans have their terrible towels to cry in. The real reason the Steelers stunk this year - no pass protection for Big Ben. In the Cleveland game Ben spent more time on his ass than Juan Valdez the Colombian coffee grower.  In 2010, the coach is gowing to throw that play - drop back three steps and get tackled - out of the playbook for good. Look for the Steelers to come storming back 2010.

Denver Broncos (8-8). From 6-2 to 2-6. Now that was some fine coaching by Josh McDaniels. By the end of the year JMD managed to alienate everyone including the equipment girl. In benching his best two receivers (Marshall and Scheffler) in the season finale JMD proved what a knucklehead he really is. Rumor has it he is going to trade the entire team for the 1984 Patriots. Tony Eason and his retired gang probably could outplay Kyle Orton and Knowshon "One Yard and a Cloud of Dust" Moreno. Because of Moreno, the NFL had to come up with a new statistic - tripped over own shoe laces.  Look for Denver to supplant the Detroit Lions as the poorest coached team in the League in 2010.

Washington Redskins (4-12). Dan Snyder. Ha! If Mike Shanahan gets the Redskins into the playoffs next season it will not be a miracle, it will the Miracle Ear. That's right, Bell Labs it going to fit the whole team with hearing aids.  Ask Jim Zorn, "If a coach yells in the locker room and nobody listens does he make a sound?" Shanahan will finally get that dunderhead quarterback Campbell to pay attention during practice. He'll also get the Redskins O-line to block for Clinton Portis. Look for the Redskins to improve in 2010 but not enough to be better than Dallas or Philly. For that Shanahan will have draft John Elway's son.

To be continued...

Today, a hurting Bengals club cried and grieved the loss of their teammate and friend. Chad OchoCinco wore one of Chris' jersies during the scheduled Wednesday practice...QB Carson Palmer lead the team in dedicating the rest of the season to the memory of Chris and defensive coordinator Mike Zimmer's wife, Linda. Zimmer's wife died unexpectedly in October.

A tragic and premature end to a promising young life. Prayers and condolences to his family and loved ones.

#2 Texas vs. #1 Alabama

Orange Bowl (Jan. 5)

#9 Georgia Tech vs. #10 Iowa

Tostitos Fiesta Bowl (Jan. 4)

#4 Texas Christian (TCU) vs. #6 Boise State

Sugar Bowl (Jan. 1)

#5 Florida vs. #3 Cincinnati

Rose Bowl (Jan. 1)

#8 Ohio State vs. #7 Oregon

(ready to play the counting game?)

The Polo Grounds, Home of the New York Giants in 1900.

A simple question really:  if you had the opportunity to watch any World Series in major league baseball history, which Fall Classic would you attend?  Me, I'd take the 1905 match-up between the Giants and the Athletics, a series in which all five games were shutouts, with the young Giant, pitching ace Christy Mathewson, pitching three of them.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1905_World_Series

A source close to Brett Favre said the quarterback, pending a physical, will sign a contract with the Minnesota Vikings for between $10 million to $12 million, according to ESPN senior NFL analyst Chris Mortensen.

Vikings coach Brad Childress confirmed in an e-mail to The Associated Press Tuesday morning that Favre was traveling from Mississippi to meet with the team.

Asked if the plan was to sign Favre on Tuesday, Childress replied: "In a perfect world."

Favre, a longtime star in Green Bay, came out of retirement last season to play for the Jets. He retired again, only to then entertain the idea of joining the Vikings. Last month, Childress said the quarterback would stay retired.

The pronouncement now appears to be premature.

According to Mortensen, the Vikings had sent their private plane to Hattiesburg, Miss., and left with Favre on it at 10 a.m. ET. The plane is expected to land in Minneapolis at about noon ET; Favre is expected to take a physical later Tuesday.

Two television stations reported that Favre was seen boarding a plane Tuesday morning that was headed to Minneapolis.

Sources told WDAM in Hattiesburg that Favre had said: "We may know something by dinner."

According to Minneapolis television station WCCO, a high-level source also said that Favre is expected to sign a deal with the Vikings on Tuesday.

On Monday, Vikings quarterback Tarvaris Jackson, responding to the day's scuttlebutt that Favre was predicted to play in Minnesota this season, said he was not paying attention to any of the talk.

"I pretty much have said [Favre] probably will follow me even when I retire. I'll probably have to hear about it. I'm just trying to take care of my business, and I can't worry about that stuff," Jackson said, according to the Minneapolis Star Tribune. "If I let that stuff get to me, ain't no telling where I'd be right now. I just let it roll off my shoulder and just keep going. Just keep trying to get better."

However, if you don't have Showtime, mosey on over to FreePPV.tv to check out a live stream of it.  Donations are happily accepted there as well, just in case you begin to feel like a free-loading prick.  Enjoy the show.

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